So many reasons to be happy.
“You look beautiful in this light.” Six months later and one month left.
One more month until a whole new set of changes:
- The internship becomes a full-time job.
- Year one will be over and it’ll be my job to fix things up after messing up in school a little bit this year.
- Lenny will be graduating and I’ll be meeting his family before he moves back to SoCal.
I am so grateful for everything I’ve come to at this point in my life. The struggle is there, but I know that it’ll just make things that much easier in the long run.
For my good friends- I really miss them. It’s hard to keep in touch with everyone when you love too many people haha. But as always, we all know that we have our own things going on.
It’s almost summer! I can’t wait for the crisp, summer mornings and cool, summer nights. Even though I’m going to be busy this summer, I really am so excited to see what this summer will bring for me.
Motivations to keep me going through this crazy internship:
- Hitting my $100k revenue goal by the end of summer- I’m on track! $52k in 2 months with almost 4 more months to go!
- Finishing the internship- I said that I’d finish it, so I refuse to quit! And proving the discouraging people wrong will be a plus lol.
- Meeting cool people- I absolutely love my clients; some of them are so sweet- they treat me like family! My RC is pretty awesome too- it is really hard to stay motivated in this internship sometimes, but he’s been so helpful. I love the other RCs too. And I love, love, loooove the other interns I’ve met- we all push each other to be better and it’s great to be around those kinds of people. AND the VPs are so nice! They personally train us, and I got a call from one of the VPs yesterday just because he wanted to recognize me for the work I’ve been doing. I think that that is so great- you don’t get that kind of treatment in many places. I can’t wait to hang out with everyone this summer!
I will continue to persevere, and despite the fact that I’m unable to take part in community service or much of anything really this year, I will continue to love and love and love this world that I live in and the people who influence my life.
One more month.
From 0/5 to 5/6- maaaan, I am so happy. I need to keep this up and stay determined if I want to continue to succeed like this.
School- I’ve been struggling a little bit, trying to juggle everything with this internship, but I think I’m still doing okay. I know that I need to do well in my classes. I just need to step it up a notch.
Internship- This past weekend was so awesome. I don’t care what anyone thinks about this being a scam. As difficult as things get sometimes, I will do well and I will continue to have amazing weekends. The internship takes up a lot of time, but I think that it’s worth it. I’m learning so much, meeting new people, making new friends, challenging myself, and setting myself up to make monaaay! —>Not that this is what it’s all about, but it does add some incentive haha. I want to continue to be on the leader board!!
Work- I am so glad that I had to be laid-off. I don’t think I would have been able to handle a job on top of everything else right now. Only thing is that I miss my co-workers :/
Koinonia- Even as someone who is still a little unsure about religion at this point in my life, I’m so glad to be a part of a Christian organization wherein I can learn about Christianity in more than just an academic sense. Sometimes, I feel a little bit uncomfortable about going to the events because my beliefs are not set, but everyone is so accepting and loving that I wish I had more time to spend with these amazing people. I honestly wish that I could be a part of more religious organizations so that I could learn more about different viewpoints and decide on my own.
Other organizations- If I had more time, I would love to be a part of more clubs/orgs, especially a community service one, but I’ll have to wait until next semester it seems.
Relationship- Things are great. I’m very happy!
Friendships- Still, I haven’t had much time to catch up with many close friends lately, but I hope that they’re all doing well. I’ve had the opportunity to meet some great people through working, my internship, a few classes, and Koinonia which is pretty cool ‘cause I can have lunch with friends once in awhile to catch up. I really miss having a roommate though, just because it was nice to have someone to come home and talk to in person. Not that I don’t love spending time with Lenny, but I really miss spending time with Carolyn and her boyfriend— that’s one thing that sucks about not having weekends free anymore- I don’t get to see them.
Family- Things are okay. My mom and I still don’t see eye to eye most of the time, but my dad and I get along pretty well now which is cool I guess, considering how things flip-flopped. I haven’t talked to my brothers in awhile, but we don’t talk much in the first place anyway. And my sister is doing alright. We practically always get along. I just feel a little bad that I haven’t really had much time to spend with her since I’ve started my internship. Plus, money is a little tight right now, so I haven’t been able to spoil her haha. Supposedly, my cousin might move in with me next year when Carolyn might move back in, but considering the condition of this house, I don’t know if anyone should really be living here -.-
I guess that’s all for now. Back to studying for midterms and prepping for another great weekend with College Works Painting!
It’s going to be difficult and it’s going to take a lot of work, but I do want to try.
Before i even begin, I would like to say that i don’t really care about Valentine’s Day: and no its not because i don’t have a significant other or im single, I have a reason. Sure the history portion is fucked up, but i don’t understand American Culture sometime… Let’s be real: just because there’s a holiday for people to go out and find their “Valentine’s” doesn’t mean you need to be hyped about and be like “Forever Alone” or the opposite. Matter of fact, its rather funny that majority of you quarrel so much about this holiday. Seriously, beside those special anniversaries and what not, just because its a national holiday, you’re going to decide to be all cutesy and shit with someone. Because i know there are a lot of you out there who probably don’t do the scales you do of V-day on any regular day. Seriously, chocolate companies/flower boutiques and etc. are probably like, “Hell yea! Boutta get rich today!” Like seriously. I bet at one point in time those industries were at such a low point they were like, “Ayo, Mr. Prez-a-dent can we get a special day of the year so we can increase our revenue and yall could make more money and shiat” And then boom. Valentine’s day. Like just think about that shit. Mainly the fact that people are so hyped about V-day.
Just some thoughts and ranting. Whether you disagree or agree, i could honestly not muster up any fucks to give. Just food for thought.
I agree with you that holidays like Valentine’s Day are mostly based off of capitalism in America, but I don’t think that we should renounce such holidays completely. Yes, it is important for couples to show that they love each other everyday, but for the couples that forget, I think that Valentine’s Day reminds us to remember that cutesy dates, roses, and balloons keep the romance alive. Not that material things are really important in a relationship, but I don’t see a problem with the want of someone to make his/her significant other happy with a small gift. I get what you’re saying though, and I don’t think that it’s an important holiday, but the way I see it is that as long as no one expects anything, then the goodness of the holiday is the part of giving. And for those without significant others, it’s a day to be happy for the people that have found someone that makes him/her happy- even though most single people don’t find happiness in that lol. Maybe I’m just a romantic haha.
It’s been awhile since I’ve had a real post on here so here’s a little update and stream of consciousness:
- Today, a guy yelled at me because I pushed him away from me when he crashed into me while skating down a ramp on campus. He was calling me names and making fun of me, but I can handle myself, so I brushed that jerk off my shoulders. Probably shouldn’t have yelled back, but I ain’t no… jk but seriously… This kid was so rude; I’m glad he fell on his face. I was about to slap him for sticking his hand in front of my face. BUT I’m a nice person that is smarter and more civilized (until you get me mad). People are so rude these days though. While I was walking home the other day, this guy at BART walked up to me and said, “Damn girl, you hella sexy. You hella sexy. Come over to the side and talk to me for a second” and something else that I could not understand through his mumbles, but I just said “No, thank you” and repeated myself more loudly when he continued to talk to me. Seriously? What is wrong with people? Can we please teach them manners?
Other than that:
- Life is school, Lenny, lunch with friends, and Koinonia hangouts.
- I start my internship this weekend! I’m really excited to have this opportunity where I’ll be able to make my own decisions in the work that I do, and my successes will be based on my determination and leadership abilities (which I feel have gone to waste this past semester).
- I really want to get back into community service. It is something that I truly miss. But things haven’t worked out too well whenever I’ve tried to go to CKI events and I’m always so busy. Even without work, it’s difficult. To compensate, I try my best to make the best out of my daily interactions, and hope that just by staying positive and talking to people in just the right way, I might make someone’s day a little bit better. It’s not enough, but through my studies, I’m learning how to learn and love better which I know will help me serve better when I find a stable job.
- I’m still hesitant to get a job. Part of me wants to just focus a bunch of energy into my internship and my classes, and another part of me wants to get a job so that I won’t just be getting paid based on my performance. I’ve applied, so we’ll see what happens.
- My sister is the LTG-elect for my past division, and I couldn’t be more proud of her. I’m so excited to see what she’ll do for the broken family. Even though I’m not a part of Key Club anymore, I still really care for my home club and division, and I was really sad to see it kind of fall apart this year. Knowing that my sister will be in charge next year gives me hope that D8 will be restored to a prospering division like it had been last year. Our division members had so much love for each other and for the service that we did, and I’d love to see my sister bring that back. I’m really proud of her for getting to where she is.
- Life’s good.
- I feel like I haven’t talked to a lot of my close friends in awhile. I miss them. But I do feel that this time apart is good for us. I know that even though we’re all so far away from each other, we still have each others’ backs, and our love and bonds are still the same. “I carry you with me.”
- Reflection, reflection, reflection. I’m learning so much out here- this semester more than last- and I just need to remember to continuously reflect on my life so that I don’t get caught up in all the madness. What is great about life? Learning, loving, and growing.
- As always, I am happy. With friends, family, you, and everything else. Nothing’s bringing me down! Woo!
Healthy self-awareness means:
1. Being aware of our changing emotions, and knowing who and what tends to trigger them. Then, using that knowledge to choose how you respond.
2. Being aware of our negative, destructive thoughts patterns, and challenging our tendencies to jump to wrong conclusions … or to over-exaggerate how terrible things are.
3. Being aware of what is happening, and changing, in our bodies so we know when we are stressed, or are reaching breaking point.
4. Understanding our habits and behavioural patterns – so we’re not at their mercy, and they don’t control our lives.
5. Being aware of our assumptions and expectations, and knowing how they influence various aspects of our lives – like the goals we set, and the things we say and do.
6. Being aware of how our actions, our words and responses affect and influence other people in our lives (in both a positive and negative way).
An 87 Year Old College Student Named Rose
The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn’t already know.
I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned round to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me
with a smile that lit up her entire being.
She said, “Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I’m eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?”
I laughed and enthusiastically responded, “Of course you may!” and she gave me a giant squeeze.
“Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?” I asked.
She jokingly replied, “I’m here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids…”
“No seriously,” I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.
“I always dreamed of having a college education and now I’m getting one!” she told me.
After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake.We became instant friends. Every day for the
next three months, we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this “time machine”
as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.
Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and
she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.
At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I’ll never forget what she taught us. She was
introduced and stepped up to the podium.
As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor. Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, “I’m sorry I’m so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I’ll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell
you what I know.”
As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, “We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop
playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day.
You’ve got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.
We have so many people walking around who are dead and don’t even know it!There is a huge difference between growing
older and growing up.
If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don’t do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old.
If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.
Anybody can grow older. That doesn’t take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change.
Have no regrets.
The elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those
She concluded her speech by courageously singing “The Rose.”
She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.
At the year’s end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago. One week after graduation Rose died
peacefully in her sleep.
Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it’s
never too late to be all you can possibly be .When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they’ll really enjoy it!
These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.
REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS
We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.
Do you ever think about all the people who you might have fallen in love with if only you’d taken a different way home or stood a little longer in the bread aisle at the supermarket? All the people who might have been an integral part of your life but instead you’ll never know them. The unimaginable impact that our mundane choices have on our lives really gets to me. Think of how many times I might have died if I’d made different choices. Maybe I’d be homeless. Maybe I’d be famous. Maybe I’d be rich. Sometimes I’m so overwhelmed by the impact of my choices that I can’t choose anything at all because I’m afraid today will be the day that I make the choice that changes everything.
The Air That I Breathe - Maroon 5
People never change,
They seem to stay the same.
They wear different clothes,
But play the same games.
Many different ways
To say the same thing.
Searchin for the right words,
The ones that would make you stay.
Exchanging the way things were
For the way that they should be,
And choosing these words
Is saying to her,
The things that she never heard
But always deserved.